I dated my wife for over five years before she became my fiancee. I took so long because, emotionally, I wasn’t ready to be a husband, but I also struggled to make sense of marriage. Weren’t we already exactly like a married couple? So what was going to change?

More than I thought, actually.

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Which band do we want? What color should the groomsmen wear? Can our rehearsal dinner video montage be made to resemble A-Ha’s “Take on Me”? For my fiancée, Emily, and me, the planning process for our wedding was routine.

Until 32 days before “I do,” when a new entry was Sharpie’d onto our to-do list:

Cancer.

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